No Resolutions

The end of the year signifies the time for people to think ahead about what they want to see accomplished in the coming year. Most people make resolutions – to quit smoking or to lose weight or to change the way they run their business – but to me I always thought that making a resolution was a way of procrastinating. When you come to the realization that you want to quit smoking or lose weight or change your business, then you need to do it right away, while you are motivated. Don’t put it off until January 1^st because by then you might just lose interest!

So I’m not going to be the one telling you how to reach your goals in 2010. Instead, I’m going to revisit some strategies I’ve already covered this year that can guide you to organize your systems and your brain in order to help you reach your goals any time of year. There’s a difference.

• If you feel like a lot of your time gets wasted, then you must set up a new system for managing and controlling your time. I use the Time Boxing theory in conjunction with my Outlook Calendar to remind me of everything, for scheduling appointments and other must-dos. Figure out a system that works best for you and stick to it.
• Cleanse your environment by organizing your files in your file cabinet and in your computer. Create new ones where necessary, delete or remove unused ones. Institute a new filing system if you find the old way isn’t all you want it to be, or just modify the old one to work better for you. Everything should be easy for you to find.
• Unclutter your Inbox either by revamping your existing email system or create a whole new one. Create folders and subfolders for each of your clients or projects and institute a way to handle emails as they come in. You need some kind of system that will help you take action quicker and also not let emails go forgotten indefinitely in the Inbox.
• Consciously choose to think good thoughts by using Thought Management. Visualize what you want to achieve, think about people or events that make you happy, and think positively. When joy is in your head, it’s also in your heart.
• Teamwork is quite important when it comes to reaching your goals. No one can do everything alone. Working Together Works so get someone to brainstorm with or to be held accountable to throughout the steps of reaching your goals. Having moral support can be a huge motivator.
• Be Respectful and Be a Responsible Person. Your words and actions towards others should always be watched and measured. Think about what you want to do or say before you act or react. Living your life with Integrity will give you a clear conscious while moving towards your goals.
• Be your own person by exercising your Individual Independence. Set goals and dreams based on what you want, not on what others want for you. And then go after them in a way that feels right and comfortable for you.

If you want or need a refresher on any of the above topics, please visit my newly relocated website at http://kimberlymccloskey.wordpress.com.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? You may as long as you let me know and include this blurb with it: (C) 12/18/2009 by Virtual Assistant Kimberly J. McCloskey who writes articles to help everyone improve their personal and professional efficiency. Request your subscription to her newsletter at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Delegate Without Assuming

A while back I was talking with one of my virtual assistant friends about a situation she was experiencing. Basically there were a series of communication failures that occurred over a weekend resulting in her not receiving a project from a client until the requested deadline.

I feel there were mistakes made which could have avoided the ensuing crises. I also feel that these could have been avoided had assumptions not been made.

So let’s review some basic steps that should be taken whenever you delegate a project to someone whether it’s an in-house employee or a virtual contractor.

• Project overview: When you hand over a project, make sure the overall scope is understood by the preparer. For example, you want a postcard mailing to go out to a specific neighborhood.
• End result: Make it perfectly clear how you want the end result to look, feel and/or perform. If it’s postcard design, you want the recipients to feel motivated to act on the postcard. If it’s a new web site, you want viewers to feel your friendly personality come through in the design and context.
• Steps: If there are specific steps or programs that must be used in order to complete the project, make sure that information is discussed and provided. Whether you’re delegating bookkeeping or newsletter preparation, ensure the preparer has access to the proper software.
• Priority level: You need to know beforehand what the priority level on your project is and convey that. Is it extremely important or can it wait? Is it a client proposal that must be done immediately or is it sending holiday greetings to customers that can be done over the course of a couple of weeks?
• Deadline: Beyond the priority level, you must establish a deadline for the project completion and share that with the preparer so they can arrange their schedule accordingly. Again, does that proposal need to go out today? Will you be happy if those holiday cards are in the mail by December 15th? Make certain this information is clearly spelled out.
• Updates: Do you want progress updates from the preparer during the course of the project? Establish how many or how often before the project begins. Do you want to know what’s going on each step of the way? Or will a daily or weekly update suffice to keep you in the loop?
• Verify receipt: When you submit a project for completion, if you do not physically deliver it then it’s your responsibility to follow-up and verify that it was received. This rule is doubly important if you consider the job to be a rush or if you submit it during non-business hours. Electronics are not perfect, so it is possible for emails, text messages or phone messages to get mis-delivered or not delivered at all. The intended recipient doesn’t know they’re missing an urgent message, so the burden can’t possibly be on them.
• Emergencies: Although I understand wanting to allow time for unexpected obstacles when establishing a time-line or a deadline for a project, I feel that when the obstacle presents itself, it’s time to push aside the safety barrier and be completely honest with the preparer. You’ve already lost the cushion and the project has automatically jumped into the “Urgent” category. Communicate honestly with the preparer and together you can negotiate an acceptable newly established drop-dead deadline.

Remember that the preparers of our projects cannot read our minds, therefore it is our responsibility to communicate clearly what we expect of them. They will be better prepared to complete a project to our satisfaction only if they are provided adequate time and information. Granted, when we’ve worked with the same person on the same project many times over, most of the above information won’t need to be relayed unless something changes, but still, don’t make assumptions.

The saying “When you assume, you make an a– out of you and me” was created for a reason.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? You may as long as you let me know and include this blurb with it: (C) 11/16/2009 by Virtual Assistant Kimberly J. McCloskey who writes articles to help everyone improve their personal and professional efficiency. Request your subscription to her newsletter at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

A Warm Welcome

Hello to all my faithful readers of my newsletter, articles and blogs and welcome to my new location on the Internet. Yes, things look a little different here, but they also look somewhat the same.

My favorite photo of the sunlight through the trees comes with me everywhere I go. Past articles have made the move here as well. And my personality will continue to shine through in all my future writings.

So thank you for stopping by! Maybe you can take a moment to look around at the new layout and give me your feedback – I’d love to hear it.

Very kind regards,
Kimberly J. McCloskey
11/16/2009

Smooth Sailing

Reflecting upon my 14 year wedding anniversary last week, I recognized there are some parallels between maintaining a marriage, a friendship or a business relationship. Solid, long-lasting partnerships don’t happen on their own – they need to be nurtured. Such things as loyalty, communication and desire are important aspects to any relationship but here I’ll talk about how they pertain to our business lives.

• Trust: Trust comes from knowing those around us are being honest in what they say and what they do. As a business person, we must trust our business partner, our employees, and our clients. Furthermore, the trust needs to be mutual so that everyone can perform their obligations each day to their best abilities.
• Loyalty: Being loyal to our professional connections creates a solid bond. If we consistently subcontract to the same person or buy from the same vender, it is an on-going demonstration of our faith in their abilities. Consequently, as a result they may offer us better deals or rates than their averge customer and refer us to others.
• Communication: We must be able to openly communicate about responsibilities, touchy issues and the occasional emergency or disagreement when they arise. Communication encompasses asking questions or for help when needed and respectfully answering other people’s questions. Communication also means returning phone calls and replying to email in a timely manner.
• Teamwork: When employees, managers and owners in our offices or businesses get along, everyone who enters our environment will be well aware of it. Camaraderie ultimately leads to everything going smoothly. Customers and venders will be more confident in their business dealings with us because they’ll know we’re all working toward a common goal.
• Compromise: Sometimes not everyone agrees to the best course of action in a particular situation, so being able to negotiate and compromise allows for a workable solution. Everyone can be happy with the outcome.
• Desire: There needs to be a mutual desire to continue and maintain the relationship by everyone involved. No relationship will survive if only one person is working on it.

These are just a few examples of principles that not only must be utilized to maintain a successful marriage vow, but also a long-term friendship or business relationship.

Take a few minutes to review your relationships and determine which ones are being properly sustained or not, then review the above list of attributes. They may be simple, but they are very powerful.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? You may as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: (C) 10/2009 by Kimberly McCloskey, Virtual Assistant who writes articles on how everyone can improve their professional and personal efficiency. Request your subscription to her newsletter “Productive Pointers” at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Gray Areas of Integrity

I was quite surprised when I began researching the term “integrity” of all the variables that come into play when defining it. I thought having integrity went hand-in-hand with being honest – and it does, but with a twist. The twist is what you believe being honest is, not necessarily what someone else believes. You call the shots about what is right and wrong. That hardly seems fair, does it? Shouldn’t it be something that is black and white that everyone readily agrees on?

For example, being supportive of family and friends, being a hard worker, and paying our bills on time – to us these all mean having integrity. However, doing drugs, lying, cheating and stealing are acts that lack integrity. Right? These are things most people tend to agree on.

The term integrity suggests trustworthiness whereas we are known to keep our promises, always doing what we said we would do. It also suggests incorruptibility, in that we are not capable of telling a lie or not sticking to a pledge we made. We will always do the right thing, even if it isn’t the most popular. These are the descriptions we are most familiar with.

But as we examine it closer, from here the water gets a little muddy – or the web gets a bit tangled.

Another definition I found says that integrity is adherence to moral principles, to our own personal code of conduct. What is right and wrong by our standards. Integrity is what we want it to be, what we believe it to be.

So, is having a glass of wine with dinner acceptable or not? We may disagree on this point, but we will do what we feel is right. In the end we both will have felt we acted with integrity because we followed our own beliefs. See? It’s not black and white and I believe that is an important lesson when forming opinions. Just because we don’t agree, doesn’t mean either one of us is “wrong”.

Regardless of what is considered right or wrong by other people, there are benefits to living our life with integrity – always following our own conscience.

• By sticking to what we believe is right, we won’t have any regrets.
• We won’t be bothered by rejection and criticism because we know our decisions were sound.
• If we always stick to the facts, we won’t have to worry about keeping stories straight.
• When we have nothing to hide, we fight harder to stand up for our character.
• It’s easier to accept responsibility and move beyond it when mistakes are made.
• People will respect us.

When we live our life with integrity it will obviously be uncomplicated and less stressful – we aren’t tangling any webs. It really is as simple as sticking to our beliefs and always doing the right thing.

Whenever we act with integrity, we win. Whenever we choose not to, we lose.

Do you want to be a winner or a loser?

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? Please do! As long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: (C) 9/23/09 by Kimberly McCloskey, Virtual Assistant, who shares articles on how people can improve their personal and professional productivity and efficiency. Request your copy of her newsletter “Productive Pointers” at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Give It To Me Straight

I find it disappointing when people tell me what they think I want to hear instead of being honest. Don’t you feel the same way? Honesty is always the best policy and it’s the one I prefer to deal with.

For example, say I talk to a prospect who says they want to use my services, they just need to get their ducks in a row, and will get back to me in a day or two. In the interim I take steps to prepare for a new client and project. However, if in the end the prospect never calls or emails and, worse yet, they ignore my attempts at contacting them.

How is that fair?

Another example would be an acquaintance saying they’re going to invite us over for dinner some day. That’s a kind gesture, but they shouldn’t just say it to sound kind. When they voice the idea, they should just go ahead and suggest a day.  If there’s no reason right now why they can’t have us over, they shouldn’t even mention it.

How do you think that makes us feel?

Yet another example is something we’re going through right now. We’re trying to find a forever home for a puppy we’ve come across. People shouldn’t tell me they might take the puppy if they don’t really want the puppy. If they say they’re going to think about it and will call me tomorrow with an answer, they should do it. Otherwise me and everyone else who is trying to find a home for the puppy are focusing our energies in the wrong place.

How is that helpful?

Do you see why telling people what you think they want to hear is wrong on so many levels? You can’t read other’s minds so what gives you the right to believe you know what they really want to hear?

And what happens if/when paths cross again in the future? Someone is going to feel awkward or uncomfortable.

Personally, I would much prefer you tell me right up front what you’re honestly thinking. By doing so you’re giving me the information I need to move forward. I agree, it may not be in the direction I was hoping for, but it’s so much better to be working on a viable possibility than to be banking on something that’s never going to happen.

So the next time you find yourself wanting to say something nice just to avoid hurting somebody’s feelings, think about the short and long term implications. Then do the right thing and just be honest. It’ll save everyone a lot of grief.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: © 9/4/2009 by Virtual Assistant (VA) Kimberly McCloskey who publishes the newsletter “Productive Pointers” featuring articles on how we all can improve our personal and business efficiency. Request your subscription at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Chatterbox Restraint

Are there people you know who make you cringe when you see them approach because they’re going to tell you far more than you need or want to know? I think we all know someone (or a couple some ones) like that.

But is there any possibility that you could be that person?

Do you ever feel like people aren’t listening to you? Have you noticed that some people avoid asking you questions or steer clear of you all together? Do you ever look back on a conversation and realize you gave away too much information? Yes? No? Maybe sometimes?

Effectively communicating with others is not only about conveying the right information, but also not conveying too much information. Having a habit of dominating conversations can be damaging to your character, credibility and possibly your relationships. And chances are if you are a chatterbox with your family and friends, you’re probably long-winded with complete strangers, too.

Here are some tips to keep your conversations interesting to others:

• Think first. Sure, we all get excited when we have something great to share and feel as if we can discuss it nonstop for hours – Warning! Warning! If you recognize this feeling before a conversation, stop and think about what you want to convey. Stick to the important points or summarize.
• Skip the details. When you begin a new topic, summarize it and stick to only the most important elements. A good rule of thumb might be to keep your comment to less than 30 seconds (which is longer than you think!) and see how it is taken by the listener. Details should be saved for those who want to know them.
• Questions are good. One surefire way to know if someone is interested in what you are talking about is if they ask questions. If they want to know more, they will inquire and this is how a mutually appealing conversation develops. If they don’t ask for more information, that might be a hint to let the topic drop.
• Allow interaction. If the other person tries to interject a comment, let them! Remember that a true conversation consists of more than one person sharing their thoughts and ideas. Allow time for the other person to speak and certainly do not interrupt them when they do.
• Gauge the pause. When the other person pauses and you think they are through speaking, wait a couple of beats to ensure they really are finished. In actuality, they may just be gathering thoughts for their next comment!
• Body language. If the person you’re speaking to keeps turning away, resumes a task without keeping eye contact with you, sighs heavily, or otherwise looks bored out of their minds then you’re probably talking too much. Eye rolls, foot tapping, mindless nodding, inappropriate uh-huhs, ignoring you, staring through you, and looking at their watch are all signs the listener isn’t listening. Be kind and let them off the hook.

Overall some people might think “talkers” to be self-centered, conceited, ignorant or lacking in social skills, but I disagree (most of the time). In my experience, talkers are excited about a subject and just want to share their knowledge or experience. Some may be looking for acceptance and wrongly feel they have to impress. Others have minds that are moving a mile a minute (dare I say attention deficit?) which often leads to getting side-tracked. And people like me are detail-oriented and have a tendency to share more information than is necessary.

This doesn’t make talkers bad people! On the contrary, I believe if we all step back and assess our own conversations, we might find ourselves falling into the chatterbox category sometimes. If you do, then now you should be more aware of it. Now you can harness your thoughts and engage in more fulfilling conversations more often.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: © 7/31/2009 by Virtual Assistant (VA) Kimberly McCloskey who publishes the newsletter “Productive Pointers” featuring articles on how we all can improve our personal and business efficiency. Request yours at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Personal Independence

Since the 4th of July holiday I’ve been thinking about independence, but not the kind we just celebrated – I’m thinking more about personal independence. Teamwork is wonderful and necessary, but I think it’s equally important to be an individual, independent person.

I feel it’s essential to have our own thoughts and opinions, our own dreams and desires. Having these makes us unique – true individuals independent of others.

• Actions: For example, we are all entitled to some quiet time and to something that is exclusively ours, and no one else’s. Allowing ourselves these luxuries – dare I say necessities – gives us the opportunity to be ourselves, to show our individuality, and to relax in the knowledge that we are doing exactly what we want to do, even if only for one hour a day or one hour a week. Mine came to the surface in two ways last year; one was learning yoga and the other was adopting my horse – these are my very own independences. What are yours?
• Thoughts: A long time ago I used to answer some questions directed at me with, “My husband says…” or “My husband thinks…” Normally I held the same opinion as him, but for some reason I wouldn’t say “I think…” Maybe I didn’t believe my opinion was of any value. Now I know differently: my opinion is what is being sought when a person asks me for it, not someone else’s opinion. However, my point is that when I would reply in that way, people probably thought I had no opinions of my own, that maybe my husband made them for me. Sadly I hear other people reply to questions just like I used to, and that leads me to believe that they do not have an opinion of their own. Maybe they do but are afraid to express them or don’t think they are worthy. Whatever the reason is, it may be leading the rest of us to the wrong assumptions. If you are one of these people – please know that your own personal individual opinions are worthy, share them.
• Desires: Every one of us probably has a goal or dream that we want to accomplish during our lifetime. I think it’s essential to make sure we are chasing our own dream and not someone else’s. This past winter my husband and I discovered what we really want to do with our lives. Not surprisingly, we came up with two different things! He wants to be an actor and I want to be a writer. But what is awesome is that the ultimate goal is the same – we still want a home in the country with enough acreage for my horse.

I acknowledge that there are leaders and there are followers, but being personally independent should have nothing to do with leading or following. Our actions, thoughts and desires should be our own, not forced upon anyone else and not imposed on us by others.

Some of us may be born with this freedom of personal independence, knowing from a young age that being an individual is an asset. But some of us (me included) had to learn it along the way. I am so grateful that I am finally here, comfortable and secure in the knowledge that I am who I am, and that my actions, thoughts and desires are my own.

Are yours?

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: © 7/9/2009 by Virtual Assistant (VA) Kimberly McCloskey who publishes the newsletter “Productive Pointers” featuring articles on how we all can improve our personal and professional efficiency. Request yours at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Be a Responsible Person

There are many crossroads in our lives where we make a decision to either take on a new commitment in our lives – or not.

• Accepting a new job
• Starting a new business
• Taking on a new customer
• Buying a house Adopting a pet
• Buying a new car
• Getting married
• Having children

A responsible person will step back and analyze the entire situation and its possible outcomes (good and bad) before making a final decision that will be based on realities.

A responsible person will:

Make the right decision. An example would be buying a new car or house and making the commitment to meet the monthly payments. Before we make our decision, we weigh the pros and cons and hopefully analyze our finances to determine if it’s affordable or not, and as a responsible person we make the best decision (even if it’s not the one we hoped for).

Respect the rewards. Taking on new responsibilities certainly can lead to rewards – that’s partly why we take them on in the first place! Like accepting a new job or new customer can lead to career advancement or increased business – but not without continued hard work.

Think of others first. Sometimes new responsibilities reinforce our own selflessness like adopting a pet or deciding to have children. They will be totally dependent upon us for many years to come and even though there will be trying and challenging times, we’ll always have their love and adoration.

Stick to life-altering decisions. Deciding to get married or start a business are life altering decisions that will only work if we are dedicated to them. These are (usually) team efforts that will require devotion and communication for many years to come.

A responsible person is someone who realizes that they are in charge of their thoughts, feelings, actions and reactions and ultimately all their choices. They are people who are conscientious of their decisions and stick to them.

If we think we are willing to take on a new commitment, we should prepare for it: research, set up systems to keep it moving smoothly, stay interested, read related material, and nurture it.

The bottom line is: We shouldn’t commit to something if we aren’t ready to take it on and be completely dedicated to it.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: © 6/28/2009 Virtual Assistant (VA) Kimberly McCloskey publishes the newsletter “Productive Pointers” featuring articles on how we all can improve our personal and professional efficiency. Request yours at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.

Accepting Appreciation

A topic of conversation that keeps coming up lately is about accepting appreciation – truly accepting and allowing it. This may not seem like the kind of subject we would need to discuss and explore, but it is because doing it the wrong way can be detrimental to a relationship.

I admit I have always had a hard time simply accepting a compliment or a gift. I don’t know why when someone complimented me on something that I felt the need to explain it – I would defend myself. And whenever I was given a gift, I always felt the need to reciprocate. Some might classify that as low self esteem or lack of trust – thinking “What do they want?”

Of course there have been many times over the years I have shown appreciation without ever expecting anything in return. So what made my intentions any different than anyone else’s? Nothing! It just took me awhile before I realized that.

For example, I received a gift in the mail this week that I wasn’t expecting but it’s a nifty gift I think I will enjoy. This came from someone I never met, but have communicated with through Twitter. My initial response was “What am I going to give back to her?” Then I realized the answer is “Nothing.” Am I going to tell her that I’m not deserving of her gift? No. I will just tell her how thankful I am and that’s probably all she is looking for.

Another example would be when someone tells me that an article I wrote was inspirational to them. Am I going to say “Oh, that article wasn’t as good as I wanted it to be.” No! I simply say “Thank you. I am so glad you enjoyed it.”

When we deny a gift – be it praise or present – it’s rude, impolite and hurtful. Think about it! The giver was sharing with their heart and wanted to put a smile on our face or give our spirits a little boost and we essentially threw it back in their face. When the same giver continuously has their gifts rejected, they eventually stop sharing them. This is bad for both parties as they each feel unappreciated but for different reasons. That’s horrible and unnecessary and can be avoided by just saying “Thank you.”

Accepting appreciation is a way of building relationships and establishing trust. It shows that we know we are worthy of the admiration and respect of others. There’s nothing wrong with being a positive influence and knowing that our good attributes don’t need to be justified!

We are all deserving of appreciation – accept that and allow people to do it. Next time you are the happy or even startled recipient of a gift of any sort – just smile and sincerely say “Thank you.”

 

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you let me know and include this complete blurb with it: © 6/1/2009 Virtual Assistant (VA) Kimberly McCloskey publishes the newsletter “Productive Pointers” featuring articles on how we all can improve our personal and business efficiency. Request yours at kimberly.j.mccloskey @ gmail.com.