In figuratively opening the doors of my business to allow in new clients, one of the factors I have come to examine is respect. It’s something I want and need from my clients – past, present and future – and I believe most people with morals and ethics feel the same way. Of course, I need to respect my clients as well, who they are as individuals and what it is they do for business.
So why is this? Why the need for mutual respect? Why not accept “just anyone” as my clientele and happily take their money in exchange for the administrative services I provide? Is it wrong of me to place such a high standard on myself and others? No! Wanting to give and receive respect is not anything to be ashamed of and I’m dragging it out into the light for everyone to see.
Yes, respect needs to be earned and freely given, but I believe it is something that can be felt early on in a new relationship. So how do I get a sense of whether or not it is there, the potential for mutual respect in the future?
It’s caring. Being kind and considerate of a person’s thoughts, feelings, desires, wishes, preferences, needs and ideas is the birthplace of respect. This must happen regardless of whether or not we understand or agree. We must value a person for their individuality and their point of view. Simply put, we have to care…about each other.
It feels good. In turn, respect radiates positive feelings. We can hear it in their tone of voice, we can see it in their eyes, and we can read it in their body language when someone respects our thoughts, feelings and desires — or not. Thus, we emit the same emotions and behaviors when we respect someone — or not. People will know if we’re genuine.
It should be all encompassing. We can respect a person’s abilities or life accomplishments, but not necessarily respect them as an individual. Recognizing one’s dedication or devotion to a cause and holding that in high esteem can occur even if they’re a pompous ass. However, I personally don’t see the value in this. If you’re not a respectable person in all aspects of your life, then your abilities will (or should) be tarnished and diminished in the eyes of others.
Without it, we’re deficient. Which leads to a situation where there is no respect, or very little of it. If our integrity is constantly challenged, it will lead to feelings of humiliation or contempt for the other person. Conversely, if we are the one lacking respect, we’ll become indifferent to what the other person is doing. We will fall into a place of tolerance or apathy. Obviously, all of these emotions will cause conflict and break down or destroy a relationship eventually.
Why engage in a relationship with a business partner, client or love interest if we don’t feel the potential for mutual respect? If that seed isn’t there to begin with, how can it possibly bloom into something constructive and sturdy over the course of time? It can’t and we shouldn’t expect it to.
So look for those signs of respect early on — I know I am.
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? You may as long as you let me know and include this blurb with it: (C) 9/22/2010 by Virtual Assistant Kimberly J. McCloskey who writes articles to help everyone improve their personal and professional efficiency. Request your subscription to her newsletter by visiting her site at www.va-partner.com
